Am…musings

S. and I have had a change of heart. Not about each other, but it does mean the end.

I really shouldn’t tease about such things, but I couldn’t resist! Our change of heart is about Ms. Paisley. And the end? Well, it’s the end of my Stray Rescue fostering career for now … I’m adopting Paisley.

As I said before, despite her penchant for Nikes, flip flops and ball caps, she’s really pretty well behaved for a puppy (Chewy decimated a few baseboards and some furniture at her age). And honestly, she’s been leaving our shoes and hats alone these days.

She’s still pretty skittish around strangers and some other dogs, but obedience classes should help with that. She also wakes up at 6 a.m. for breakfast and I’m no morning person, but I’m hoping that changes as she gets older.

Basically, it came down to the fact that even though she has some issues, she is the sweetest dog ever, and S. nor I can imagine giving her up at this point. Chewy probably couldn’t stand losing his buddy either …

Birthday Cupcake by fraley_tera on Flickr

It’d be pretty easy for me to wallow (like I did two years ago). I’m inches away from 40 … today marks my last birthday in my 30s. And I’m not what I expected to be … a do-it-all working mom with an awesome husband and two or three kids. But I have a few strong beliefs about the situation:

• Wallowing never did anyone any good (even if we all still fall into it every once and while).
• Gratitude is a beautiful and powerful thing.
• And like I said last year … if I could do these 39 years over again, I’d have to think long and hard about changing much … if it meant giving up any of the amazing experiences I’ve had and wonderful people I’ve met along the way.

So here’s what I’m grateful for this year …

• Giving and getting love – S. is still making me smile, laugh and feel loved every day. And there’s nothing like the feeling of someone freely accepting and being grateful for my love.
• Amazing family and friends – I’d never make it without the love and support of and for my parents, other family members and my friends, including my wonderful neighbors.
• Facebook – It might be odd to include on a birthday gratitude list, but this year Facebook brought me S. Plus I’m truly thankful to be able to stay in touch with people that likely wouldn’t be in my life without it.
• A job that’s more than paying the bills – Of course I have my moments, but overall I love what I do, where I do it and the teammates and clients that make it fun and rewarding.
• My health – This year did include two fibroid surgeries, but overall, I’m healthy, which I don’t take for granted.
• My house, my car and my stuff – It isn’t everything (which is why it’s last on the list), but I appreciate having the means to live comfortably.

Just like last year … when I blow the candles out today, I’ll wish for many more days of gratitude.

Paisley and Chewy are nightmare pullers on the leash. With Chewy it’s annoying, but Ms. Paisley now weighs 50 pounds and is incredibly strong so her crazy pulling is downright hazardous. Plus, it seems the college girl isn’t going to adopt her so I need to whip her into shape on the leash for adoption events.

I shared my dilemma with a coworker who quickly recommended a harness they sell at her favorite pet store. The pet store is Pet Supplies “Plus” on Manchester in Ballwin. I was expecting a small boutique store with a limited selection, but it is just as big as any “big box” store … only with boutique service and a better selection, making it well worth the drive for me. There are lots of friendly employees willing to help and one quickly fit Paisley in the Premier Easy Walk Harness and then suggested I take her for a walk around the store and outside to see how she did. It was only a short trek, but the difference with the harness was miraculous … no pulling. And she didn’t seem super irritated with it like Chewy is with the one that goes over his mouth. I bought him one too.

I also found another great product. Chewy and Paisley can also go from zero to “kill” with plush toys in an instant. Pet Supplies “Plus” offers a line of Tuff Plush toys and I bought one for less than most toys at the “big box” places. They’ve been playing tug-of-war and destroy-the-squeaker with it for about an hour and despite being slobbery as hell, it’s still in great shape. I also like that the toys don’t have traditional stuffing so when they do kill it (I imagine the time will come), I won’t have a huge mess like normal.

P.S. If you know of anyone looking for a super sweet, really great dog, let me know!

Money, religion and children … they’re hot topics relationship experts say a couple needs to discuss and come to terms with to be successful. Among many couples I know, there’s another subject that can create relationship waves … weight. This revelation has occurred to me because … well … I’ve instigated a joint diet with S.

As I mentioned in the fried chicken post, S. has been traveling a lot and sort of fell away from the healthy eating habits he started before I met him. Because I’m weak, I fell with him … and truth be told, haven’t been eating very healthy for a while.

I’m tired of feeling slothy and sluggish and asked S. if he wanted to work together at it when he’s finished traveling last weekend. Now I’m thinking this might test our relationship a bit and I’m wondering how we’ll weather it.

There are a few things in our favor:

• We love and accept each other the way we are. I think the weight-challenged relationships are those where one person is pushing the other to lose weight because they aren’t happy with the person’s appearance.
• We’re doing this for ourselves because we want to be healthy and feel better … again, not because one is pushing the other to look better.
• S. is a coach and instructor and knows how to motivate and push the right way.
• We’re both pretty roll-with-the-flow. Even though weight is a sensitive topic, I think our flexible natures will help us overcome issues.

We hit our first minor road bumps Friday night:

• Because he’s a little goofy (one of the reasons I love him), S. has been calling his diet “operation shredded beef.” It makes me laugh, but doesn’t work for me when we’re talking about my diet. He quickly came up with “operation slim fast” for me. I love it.
• His diet approach in the past has included eliminating alcohol, which doesn’t sound like fun to me. We’re compromising with low-sugar, lower-calorie cocktails only on the weekends.

We started today. I’ll keep you posted.

About two weeks ago, someone who was nearly blind and didn’t have their glasses or contacts in would have thought my garden looked fantastic. The rest of us … we knew I was growing an amazing crop of weeds. Some were taller than my 5 feet 2½ inches and had trunks and root balls to rival a small tree.

I had good intentions and bought seeds months ago. But the weeds invaded early and after much thought and consultation, I decided tilling again was the way to go. I borrow a friend’s and didn’t ask very early. It’s also a beast so I can’t do it myself. S. offered to help, but it was early in our relationship, and I decided I’d rather do fun things than work in the yard. I figured we’d have plenty of time later (I didn’t get the garden in until July 4 last year … not ideal, but it worked). But S.’s summer work schedule is a little hectic and he coaches a baseball team that travels to tournaments most weekends so it just wasn’t possible.

We finally got it tilled last weekend. (It’s ridiculously hard work so thank you babe!!!) Some of the craziest weeds wouldn’t budge even with the tiller so I dug them out this morning. I bought a ton of different pumpkin and gourd seeds and will plant them this afternoon since there’s plenty of time until harvest. I plan to pitch the other vegetable seeds, but might see what plants I can find at Lowes or Home Depot at this point.

Lessons learned for next year:

• I’m going to try putting weed cloth down at the end of this season.
• Free isn’t worth the hassle … S. and I will rent a better tiller next year.
• We’ll start early, before S.’s crazy summer schedule kicks in.

Apparently, not all Whole Foods are created equal, especially when it comes to organic skincare samples.

We have two WF’s in St. Louis. The newest one is in the burbs by my office. I hate urban sprawl and the Lou has lots of it, but it made for a spacious, pleasant, almost serene WF. It’s beautifully organized and most people who work there are happy and helpful.

By contrast, the WF closer to the city is cramped and a bit frenzied. I stopped by today to pick up some Dr. Hauschka’s moisturizer. There are several varieties and a few were new. Because they are so expensive, I wanted to try two samples to make sure they worked with my sensitive skin. In the burbs I’m typically asked several times if there’s anything I need. Today, I had to search for someone to help. Then, I got a bit of sigh and a run around when I asked for the samples.

I did eventually get them, but because I’d said earlier how great they are about the samples, I wanted to share my most recent experience. And I wanted to rant a bit that it would be beneficial to WF to train its employees to give samples … after the great treatment and sample I received at the Chesterfield store, I imagine I’ve spent close to $500 on beauty products there in about three months. Without the samples, there’s no reason not to buy my Dr. Hauschka’s products online. (And yes, that dollar figure makes me cringe a bit, but I’ve been fighting adult acne for about 20 years and Dr. Hauschka’s works.)

I’m curious … have any of you tried to get samples at WF and were you successful?

You wouldn’t know it by looking at me, but I don’t eat much fried food. Also, my mom nor dad have ever fried anything that I remember. And I’m pretty sure my only foray into home frying was an ill-fated funnel cake event as a babysitting teen. The cake was delicious, but there were some stragglers in the pan that burned and filled the entire house with smoke. Because I was young and dumb … and there were no cell phones to call anyone smarter (which is exactly what I would do now that I’m old and dumb), I hastily dumped the oil on the front yard, leaving a large spot of dead grass that Herb wasn’t so happy about.

I say all that to explain why I’m not sure why I got a wild hair to fry some chicken yesterday … on a school night no less. S. has been traveling a lot for tournaments and hasn’t been quite as vigilant about his good eating habits. For no apparent reason … other than I’m weak … I’ve been very easily swayed to do the same. So when I saw a fried chicken recipe in my Glamour mag that used panko bread crumbs (which I happened to have), I thought what the heck.

The actual recipe didn’t look all that great so I hit the net for some additional inspiration, which I mostly found from a guy named Coupon Dad, but also gathered from various other sources. I used boneless, skinless chicken breast, which I like to believe made it a tiny bit healthier … and although I have no experience, I’m sure it made it much easier because they cook quickly and I didn’t have to worry much about making sure they were done, but not too tough.

Here’s roughly what I did (sorry for the lack of measurements, I just winged it … odd for me so I’m sure you can do it too!):

Boneless Skinless Fried Chicken Breast

5 thin boneless skinless chicken breasts (if you can’t find thin, you could probably pound them)
Salt and pepper
2 cups buttermilk (or this nifty substitute that worked fine for me)
6 or so shakes of hot sauce
Oil to reach one to two inches in pan/pot (peanut is recommended, I used half canola/half vegetable with fine results) – and it’s more oil than you think (nearly a small bottle)
Flour
2 eggs, beaten (I used two eggs for five thin breasts)
Panko bread crumbs
Seasoning (I used Penzey’s Northwoods Seasoning)

• Salt and pepper chicken and soak in buttermilk and hot sauce in a 9 X13 pan (most sources say overnight, I did it for two hours).
• Season flour and bread crumbs with seasoning on two separate plates (I like spicy so I piled it on).
• Heat oil to 350 degrees (Regarding temp: I have a thermometer, but a nifty hint in the Glamour worked better … add one kernel of popcorn to the oil, and when it pops, the oil is 350 degrees. Regarding pan/pot, I used a large Dutch-oven-like pot, which worked fine and seemed to help with splattering.)
• Dredge the chicken in flour, then dip in the beaten egg, then dredge in bread crumbs (one tip I’ll try next time … letting the coated chicken sit on waxed paper to allow the mixture to better adhere).
• Add chicken to hot oil and fry 3 or so minutes on one side, then flip and fry a few minutes on the other (I just did two pieces at a time and found that I needed to wait for a bit between batches to allow the oil to reheat).
• Drain on paper towels.

Unfortunately, I was so worried about frying chicken for the first time and making sure that S. and I ate it while it was hot and tasty (and it was tasty!), that this is the only pic I got …

I got a new car around Easter … a Ford Edge (which I love!). With it came three months of free satellite radio. That’s where I discovered this little ditty. How freakin’ fun is a song with these lyrics …

Lips like licorice
Tongue like candy
Excuse me miss, but can I get you out your panties?

My First Kiss lyrics

I don’t normally have fosters for more than a month or two. Buster fit the bill … my neighbors adopted him about two months after I brought him and Paisley home from the vet in late January.

Paisley, on the other hand, is still living with me … six months later. I debated just keeping her … she’s is truly the sweetest dog, and although she has some issues (ball caps and shoes – both mine and S.’s are her weakness), I think she’s going to be a good dog once she gets past the “puppies.” But she’s bigger than I’d like and she sheds lots of reddish hair that can be found all over the black clothes I typically wear. She’s also a morning dog … not a good fit with this non-morning person.

In early May, I received an application from a girl that was just about to graduate college and start a new job. I was a little concerned that it might be a tough time to get new a dog, but the girl is incredibly sweet and understands the responsibility a dog requires. She currently doesn’t live in a place where she can have dogs, but that will change in the next month or so. She’s taken Paisley to her parents’ home for a few visits. We missed her, Chewy and I … oh, and S. too! His initial vote was for me to keep her … although after the hat and a pair of Nike Shocks, his tune changed.

Luckily, the girl and her family love Paisley, and I think she’s going to adopt her in the next few weeks. Please keep your fingers crossed with me!

I recently reconnected with two former colleagues at an event. The conversation quickly turned to S. and my love life because one of them had seen my posts about him on Facebook. The other said … I bet you aren’t blogging about it because you like to keep your relationships private. I nodded because I hadn’t been blogging, but smiled to myself because I knew her reasoning wasn’t entirely true.

Yes … a little more than a year ago I took a short break from blogging because I was in a new relationship. True … I wasn’t very nice when I explained my absence in a post titled, It’s None of Your Business. At the time, I blamed it on the fact that the relationship was blossoming and I wanted to hold it close. In hindsight, I have to admit I was mum (not only on the blog, but also on Facebook) because I wasn’t sure about how he really felt about me.

With S. it’s different. There is no wondering … he tells me and shows me every day.

And being with him has been a revelation. Last year wasn’t the first time I’d found myself in a relationship where I wondered how the guy felt about me. I always knew something wasn’t right and often blamed it on complicated situations or emotions, and thought … maybe he’ll change. The truth is … it always ended with my gut being right … I was wondering and uncertain because they weren’t certain about me. For those of you wondering if someone cares about you … my advice would be to assume they don’t or can’t … and won’t. And know that you deserve someone who does.

I’m extremely grateful to have found someone who does and that I feel the same about. Now … just to find more time in the day to spend with him, work, take care of my house and … avoid more blogging breaks.