By Octal Kahn on Flickr

As I’ve admitted, I’m a bit of an overthinker, always critically thinking through scenarios and coming up with all the possible outcomes … good or bad. To some, it may appear that I’m a bit negative. The reality is it helps me figure out solutions to possible pitfalls or to decide if they are really as catastropic as they seem. Then I let it go and positively forge ahead. I also truly strive to keep negativity out my general thinking as I’ve mentioned before.

That’s why I love a fresh perspective. My favorite thus far is a client who shocked me with “win the lottery” when I was expecting “hit by a bus.” See … she chooses to say “in case I win the lottery,” instead of (the terribly negative when you really think about it) “in case I get hit by a bus.” I love it and now say it too.

The Late Bloomer Bride, Suzanne, recently provided a great (and I thought post-worthy) fresh perspective in the comments on last week’s post about her blog. Here it is: Having had a rich single life (and now a wonderful husband), I tell all my single friends that (for me anyway) “singledom” and “marriedom” have equal (though different) benefits. So, love where you are. And, if you find someone to love who loves you back along the way, then even better.

My neighbor and I have a joke that it’s “reason #XXXX” for me not to have kids any time one of her teenagers does something stupid. I also have plenty of friends and family (including my mother) who will complain about their spouses and say, “Do you really want one?”

I know everyone means well with these comments, but they’ve always fallen flat with me because I know despite the heartaches or issues, most would choose to do it all over again. And comparing their negatives with the negatives of singledom certainly didn’t make me feel any better. Much like the lottery comment, I love Suzanne’s comment and plan to keep it in my thoughts AND share it with my friends when they complain about their kids or husbands .

The theory was put to a true test a year ago. Last Thanksgiving we traveled to Dallas to spend the weekend with my cousin Melissa, who we hadn’t seen in nearly 20 years, and her husband and 5-year-old son we’d never met.

As I mentioned on the eve of last year’s trip, I’m an only child and Melissa and I were like sisters as kids … weekend sleepovers, summer vacations, the same Christmas presents every year (matching clothes, roller skates and 10-speeds … gotta love the ‘70s!). As some friends … and I imagine even some siblings … do, we grew apart as we grew older. Then as a result of a little family drama that had little if anything to do with us, we completely drifted apart after 1990 or so.

After several visits with out-of-town friends last year, I blogged about mom’s theory. She’s always been right, and the theory rang true once again during our wonderful visit with Melissa and her family last year. This year, we are back again to celebrate Thanksgiving, and she and her family also visited us in St. Louis last summer.

Melissa and I also get a kick out of the fact that my mom’s theory is so right that we fell back into our old habit … matching shoes last year and the exact same boots and nearly matching shirts this year.

I am now Facebook friends with the first boy I ever kissed. I was in third grade and he was an “older man” … in fourth grade. We really didn’t stay too close of friends after that, although we were neighbors. But when the request came today it made me smile and I figured what the heck.

Then I got to thinking. I’m also Facebook friends with my very best kisser … and my very worst.

Hmmm … how many others? Thinking about it in the car on the way home, I came up with six total. And I was sort of right … one of them hasn’t actually made the Facebook leap, but I am friends with his wife (and if you’re curious, we kissed long before they even met).

Care to share your Facebook kissing stats?

P.S. My best kisser and my worse kisser are both married, which proves kissing is in the lips of the beholder.

To replace the dread this year, two recent blog comments … one from a friend since second grade (via Facebook) and one from someone I’ve never met (who has a blog I’ve been enjoying) … inspired me to make a list of the things I’m grateful for at 38 …

1. The love and support of and for the people in my life, including my family, my friends, my neighbors and D (Both of the inspirational comments were actually about D … basically to take it one day at a time and be thankful for each one. For an over-thinker like me, it’s not always easy, but I’ve been taking it to heart since they were posted.)

2. A job that I love … possibly the first I’ve had that I don’t dread heading to every morning … and that challenges me, as well as my wonderful coworkers and colleagues.

3. My ability to take pleasure and see the wonder in the small things in life … from playing with Chewy in the hose to experiencing a good coaster to watching my food processor slice a cucumber in about a nanosecond to seeing more than 20 deer playing in a farmer’s field (D’s family’s).

4. My health … it’s nothing to take for granted as I quickly approach 40.

5. The means to live comfortably in a cute little house with a car to get me around.

When I blow the candles out today, I’ll wish for many more days of gratitude.

Last year, I was unprepared, which is a terrible feeling for a “Martha” like me. I did take a bottle of wine for the hostess, but didn’t even think about goodies for the group. There were mini bottles of wine, candy and fuzzy socks (which when mixed with a few too many Pirates on a Diet caused an unfortunate, tailbone-bruising tumble down the steps for me … but it’s the thought that counts).

We’re headed down tomorrow, and I am ready with awesome goodies for this year …

It’s a small paint can decorated with stamped cardstock and filled with a stamped candle, candy and a bottled mojito.

I think they’ll enjoy them … and I had fun making them too.

There was a car sort of in the middle of the street so I stood in the doorway a little longer than necessary. And here comes a woman. She was handing out Christmas cards … for the local Baptist Church.

It made me giggle. They probably don’t want me (or I figured I made her day … if she saves someone like me, her Saturday morning would be worth it).

By the way, despite the glasses and bottles, the party wasn’t too crazy (a lot of fun with some of the wonderful people in my life, but not too crazy). Although, I just had to post this picture of a drinking game that included … my mom!

Here’s the history:
• The year started in Phoenix with college friend Aaron and his wife Jen. Last time I was there: 2003 … I think.
• I drove from Phoenix to L.A. to see Disney friend Scott. I don’t think I’d seen him since 1994-ish.
• Bean-town and Disney friend Nicole were the next stop. She moved there from Orlando in 2000-ish and I had never visited her there … or seen her since then for that matter.
• Up next: across the border to Alberta, Canada to visit my high school friend Chrissie (and the cute Canadian men!). She moved west (Canada, Seattle, then Canada again) after college in the mid ‘90s and I had never been to see her.
• I flew from Canada to Charlotte to spend time with Disney friend and roommate Natalie and her family. I hadn’t been to visit her since 2000.
• Chicago sort of counts … Nicole ran in the marathon and in an effort to make sure it wasn’t another eight years before I saw her again (sheesh!) I drove up to hang out

Tomorrow I’m headed to Dallas to visit my cousin. I’m an only child and we were like sisters as kids … weekend sleepovers, summer vacations, the same Christmas presents every year (right down to the same color and style roller skates and 10-speeds … it was the ‘70s!). Unfortunately, as we grew up, we grew apart. And then because of her move to Dallas, a little family drama and the general bustle of life, we haven’t seen each other since 1990 or so. I blogged about my mom’s wonderful theory on old friends after my visits with Chrissie and Natalie … I’m hopeful my cousin and I will prove her right once again.

Pam and I worked together in publicity at Disney. She is an amazing and fantastic person. When we first met I was a 22-year-old intern and Pam fueled my belief that I could indeed have it all … a creative, high-profile career, amazing kids, fabulous house, great husband (or not – Pam raised the equally amazing and fantastic Katie as a single mom until she met her husband Steve).

My life hasn’t quite turned out the way I’d pictured it at 22, but perhaps the PTA Divas can help me wow my dates … the following recipe was a big hit with the last guy I cooked for. Another plus – it was super simple and quick to make. I served it with warm French bread, a tossed spinach salad and fresh berries with homemade whipped cream (a nice, saucy touch for a date).

SHOW-off SHRIMP and PENNE

1 pound peeled and deveined frozen shrimp
4 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
4 garlic cloves, minced (fine as long as you and your date are partaking!)
1 (14-ounce) can crushed or diced tomatoes
½ cup dry white wine
2 teaspoons dried basil
Course salt and cracked black pepper, to taste
1 bay leaf
½ cup kalamata olives, pitted
½ pound penne pasta (I used wheat)
½ to 1 cup crumbled feta cheese
4 tablespoons fresh chopped basil or flat-leaf parsley

Put salted water on to boil.

Thaw shrimp under running water for 2 to 3 minutes; drain and set aside.

In a large nonstick skillet, heat the oil, then sauté the garlic for one minute. Pour in the tomatoes and wine, seasoning with the dried basil, salt, pepper and bay leaf.

Bring this sauce to a simmer and cook, uncovered for about 10 minutes, stirring often. Add the olives and cook for 2 minutes; then add the shrimp and cook for about 4 to 5 minutes. Remove from heat. Remove bay leaf.

Cook the pasta until al dente, according to package directions, reserving ¼ cup of the pasta water before draining. Combine the pasta with the shrimp and sauce, adding a few teaspoons of the pasta water as necessary.

Toss mixture with the feta cheese and fresh herbs and serve immediately.

Serves 6.

The shirt was from Toddler Virtues …

A firm believer in all of Toddler Virtues’ virtues … especially “tolerance” (the shirt pictured and the one I snagged for little Braedon) … I really appreciate this Etsy seller’s mission. The shirt was also very well made and the customer service was excellent.

I don’t have a ton of toddlers in my life so I can only buy so many and want to spread the word. And please, if you haven’t shopped all the other vendors on Etsy, check it out!

I decided to use the photo as an excuse to write about an awesome site. It’s called Etsy and it’s “a place for buying and selling all things handmade.”

I love arts and crafts and for that reason, I adore this site. It supports artisans (they are individual sellers that pay Etsy a reasonable fee) and allows me to buy really cool things.

When I bought Ella’s outfit I also bought one for my friend Natalie’s new daughter Rachel …

This seller is Bella Claire Baby and I highly recommend them … the clothes are adorable and well made and the customer service was fantastic (I actually have only had wonderful experiences with all the Etsy sellers I’ve dealt with).

Happy shopping! (And perhaps if you make handmade items and want to join Etsy, happy selling.)